Are You a Nagging Wife?

This post is part of a series I did several years ago: Starting Well in 2012

This week our topic is a tough one:  Marriage.  More specifically, we’ll be talking about our role as wives … and be prepared, we’re going to cover some tough topics! Starting with one of the most difficult … our mouths!


Are YOU a nagging wife? Here's what Proverbs says about how we speak to our husbands.I don’t know about y’all but sometimes my mouth gets ahead of my brain.  And that usually results in disaster! Let’s look at what the writers of Proverbs tell us about wives and talking.  Brace yourselves.

1.  Nagging is really annoying!

See that verse at the top of the post, Proverbs 19:13?  Yeah, that compares nagging to a drippy faucet.   Ladies, he may go ahead and do what you want if you nag enough; but, trust me, it won’t be worth it.   Ask him and leave it at that.

It is better to live alone in the desert than with a crabby, complaining wife.  Proverbs 21:19 NLT

2.   Nix the complaining! 

Truly, he knows you wish the walls were a better color and that you had a newer car and that the house is too small … and if he could, he’d fix that for you.   But since he can’t do anything about any of that right now, he’d rather be living alone in the desert (or watching the ball game with his friends or playing golf or doing just about anything) than to be at home with you.

It is better to live alone in the corner of the an attic than with a contentious wife in a lovely home.  Proverbs 25:24 NLT

3.  Negativity drives him batty!

It’s true, I promise.   If you’re always in a bad mood, always frustrated, always annoyed, always ready for a fight, he’s rather be in the attic than listening to it. What we say to our husbands matters … and HOW we say it might just matter even more.  

are you guilty of nagging in your marriage? 3 truths about nagging from the Book of Proverbs

The first “S” of marriage:  Speak graciously to your husband.

In no way am I implying that we can’t have bad days, but if you’re having more bad days than good (or if you can’t even remember your last good day), maybe it’s time for a change.   It’s possible you need more rest or to let some obligations or responsibilities go for the sake of your marriage.   Maybe you need to see your doctor and confirm there is no medical cause for the way you feel.   Or perhaps you just simply need to make a choice to use words that encourage and build up instead of words that discourage and tear down.

This week, I invite you spend some time meditating (maybe even memorizing) this verse and applying it to your marriage:

Don’t use foul or abusive language.  Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them.  Ephesians 4:32 NLT

Do you tend to nag or criticize or complain?   How have you seen these habits affect a marriage?

Check out these other series I’ve written about marriage:

28 Days, 28 Ways 

31 Verses to Pray for Your Marriage


Read the Psalms this summer with Scripture Dig!


  1. Nicely put together Teri! I’ll be sharing this with friends and family too. This is so hard, and it is one area that my husband and I felt strongly enough about that we put it in our wedding vows. We speak a promise to each other every day and that reminds us that even when the stuff gets irritating we don’t have to irritate each other past the point of bearing it with love. It still happens cause no one is perfect but we are working, together, on communicating more lovingly and clearly with each other.


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