#MarriagePrayers: 1 Corinthians 6:18-20

We realize many who read these posts may be in difficult marital situations and/or have a history of abuse or trauma. We want to honor your experiences and be gentle with your hearts.  We encourage anyone in an abusive or dangerous situation to seek immediate help from a trustworthy organization. For those who have suffered trauma or abuse, we firmly believe in the ability of God to heal those hurts and urge you to find a competent Christian counselor to guide you down the long road to wholeness.  ~ Scott & Teri Lynne

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Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body. Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body. — 1 Corinthians 6:18-20

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About 20 years ago on this date I made a brave decision —for the first time I would go into and purchase something from Victoria’s Secret.

I had decided get Teri Lynne a gift for our wedding night. My plan was to walk straight in and choose the perfect item. TL was somewhat nervous when I told her my plan. But I was determined.

Afraid to go alone, I convinced a friend to go with me. We were afraid someone would recognize us so we drove an hour away to purchase this gift. He was on surveillance and I was peeking through more lace and pink than I had ever personally encountered. I was amazed at how many items they had. I’m sure the two overweight worship leaders trying to go unnoticed in the store probably looked like the two most uncomfortable perverts in the world. The discomfort was magnified when one of the salesladies asked if we needed any help. My voice cracked like a 13-year-old boy going through puberty as I tried to explain why I was there.

Then, I saw it — the perfect gift. In truth, I probably would have liked something a little more racy in nature {possibly something similar to a french maid} but I knew she would not be comfortable. So I opted for a simple, elegant, tasteful white gown. It was beautiful and my bride looked amazing in it. No model or actress could’ve come close to her beauty.

This was exactly the purpose of the gift. Every bit of embarrassment and awkwardness was worth it. My gift to her was for us. I never said, “Don’t wear this for other men” or “Don’t wear this out in public.”  She knew the gift’s purpose. Can you imagine how I would’ve felt if she began to see other men wearing the gift I gave her? Or how it would have affected her if I’d shared that gift with other women? The gift’s value would have been cheapened had it been used for anything other than its intended purpose.

God has chosen to give us a gift — the gift of a sexual relationship in marriage. How we view this gift and how we use it is extremely important.

Flee: to run away from.

Sexual immorality: any form of sexual activity outside the boundaries of a Biblically defined marriage; a selling out of sexual morality or purity.

If you are fleeing something, you must be pursuing something that stands in contrast to it. Also true is, if you are going to flee something then you have to be able to clearly understand what it is you are watching out for. Paul warns us to flee sexual immorality, an impurity of what God called good.

Recently I had lunch with Kevin, one of my oldest and closest friends. As we discussed life, ministry, and our culture,  he shared something that had occurred to him as he was preparing a sermon. He said, “We have exchanged values for viewpoints.”

How true that is. Values are objective and viewpoints are subjective. Values have a standard, worth, and —well — value. Viewpoints are whatever you feel like or want them to be. Values are treasured because they are rare and viewpoints are cheap because they are common.

Sex needs to be saved.

It’s time for the church to drive the conversation on sex. For too long we have only spoken in response to the world’s dialogue which has always held a very distorted view of the purpose and beauty of sex. For too long been we have uncomfortable with the subject and, as a result, the conversation has been hijacked.

Sex should be sacred. Hebrews tells us to honor marriage and keep the marriage bed pure. To achieve this, we must have a proper understanding of purity looks like. We keep it pure by honoring our spouse’s needs and desires. We keep its purity by keeping it personal.

Sex should be satisfying. We should desire physical intimacy with each other. Just read through the Song of Solomon and you will see desire running strong. Sex should never be a source of contention or strife. Sex should not be used as weapon or for guilt over our partners. Physical intimacy should be guarded and trusted as a tool to develop deeper connection and trust in our relationships. By creating physical desire, God invites us to share, connect with, and enter the life and soul of another human being in a profound way.

Sex should be considered spiritual. If the misuse of sex is considered sinful in the eyes of God and sin is a spiritual issue then it stands to reason this is a spiritual matter. Sex has been designed by God as a gift to His creation for the purpose of reproduction and recreation within the boundaries of Scripture. These verses in 1 Corinthians 6 encourage us to glorify God with our bodies. Sex and spirituality cannot be disconnected.

Sex is GOOD and should be considered so.

This may mean taking the time to heal from past abuse. It may mean learning to forgive past sins, either yours or your spouse’s. It might take letting go of baggage and expectations you have carried for far too long.

Guard that part of your relationship. Foster those feelings for your spouse. Pursue sexual purity and glorify God in your body.

~ Scott

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Today’s Prayer