I think you’re carrying some unnecessary guilt. In fact, I’m pretty sure you are carrying A LOT of unnecessary guilt. You’re not alone, of course. Every mom has some needless guilt rolling around her heart. Knowing the is part of what motivates you to encourage others – to see the weight lifted.
Here’s the thing, Teri, that you couldn’t have known when your girl was three and you were so ready for her to start school. She was ready too!
It’s fine that you were able to use that time while she was in preschool to volunteer at Care Net. God burdened your heart for that ministry and blessed your efforts and willingness there.
It’s fine that you enjoyed those few precious hours every morning to read and spend time doing “Teri” things. That doesn’t mean you are or were selfish.
It’s fine that even when she cried you walked away and left her with a teacher who loved her. Because the minute you closed the door, she stopped crying and started playing … just like the teacher told you she would.
You are you … and you are the mother God handpicked for that sweet girl. He knew you were not going to be the kind of mom who celebrated “Green Eggs and Ham Day” and found joy in discovering new craft ideas for each season. He knew the kind of mom your girl needs – and it is you.
Yes, He will continue to stretch you and mold you and use her to challenge and shape you. But you are a good mom – just the mom your daughter needs.
Don’t beat yourself up when you read about all the cool stuff other moms are doing with their kiddos! Don’t feel bad about all the stuff you didn’t do. Don’t ever believe the lie that your daughter deserves a better mom. God didn’t place her in your womb by chance or accident. He knows what He is doing. She needs you … and you are enough!
Oh and Teri, if you get a chance, will you be sure to tell the other moms you know that same thing:
God chose you for your child and you are enough!!