More than “The Most” is “The Only”

Some years ago, my husband and I were privileged to hear Gary Thomas speak at an event. At that time, I had only read his book, Authentic Faith (affiliate link), but had determined that he was one of those writers whose every book I wanted to consume. {Which, by the way, has been true!} In the course of the evening, Mr. Thomas shared an idea about beauty which I had never heard before that night.

He said that he began praying the day he realized he was to spend his life with his now-wife that she would be his standard of beauty … in every way.   That every other woman he ever saw would be measured against the plumb line of his wife and found wanting.  He asked that God would make his wife the only definition of beauty in his life.

As I sat there, transfixed by this concept, Scott leaned over to me and said, “You are the only beautiful woman I have ever seen.”

Only … singular, unique … one.

I’m learning, sometimes slowly, to remember this … When he says “You are beautiful”  … wherever, whenever …  I need to stop and see myself as he sees me … a woman, a friend, a lover, a soul-mate, a dream-catcher, and a hand-holder. Where I, far to often, see failure and “mess” … Scott sees passion and love and beauty.

Today, we will celebrate our 14th year of marriage.  I’ve no idea what the day will hold but I know this … the greatest gift he’s ever given me is the knowledge that I am not “the most” in his life … I am “the only.”

Treasuring my marriage and linking up with Ann about The Practice of Marriage,

Read the Psalms this summer with Scripture Dig!


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