Often I find myself longing for more … more time with Scott, more desire to eat right and exercise, more patience with Casiday … and more of Christ. I echo the words of His cousin, John, “I must decrease so He can increase.” How I yearn for the world to see Him and not me … and yet I find that a most difficult task.
God’s Word, though, is full of wisdom in this pursuit. Time and again I find myself praying the words of David from Psalm 139 … “Search me, O God, and know my heart” (v. 23a). How I pray fervently the Lord will do a transformational work in my life … and yet I know, that great change I desperately desire, will only come through deep searching of my heart by the One who knows me best.
I’ve studied this verse and dug deep … for I want to understand what I am asking when I call on God in this way. What beautiful treasures I have found.
Search me, O God ~ This searching is not a casual glance at my life but a thorough digging through me to find those hidden things. Thoughts and attitudes, longings and fears, those deep things … some of which I am not even aware affect me … but that holy searching by the holy God finds all things … and reveals them to the Light of His very presence. Oh the joy of knowing I have been searched by God!
and know my heart ~ So rich are these four words! Know is transliterated “yada” … to perceive, it conveys the idea of sexual knowledge … deep intimacy. When we call on God to know our hearts, we are inviting Him in to those deep recesses of ourselves. The heart is that seat of all emotion, of our desires, our hopes, our dreams. All that we feel and long for are held in the heart. No wonder the wise son of David urges in Proverbs, “Guard your heart for it is the wellspring of life” (4:23, NIV).
Guarding conveys a watchman overlooking the city … peering into the distance to see what danger may be ahead. We are called to be looking ahead … to protect our hearts, to be prepared. We must guard our hearts, for our heart – our emotions – will deceive us, will mislead us. Basing our lives, our relationships with others, our confidence in Christ on our feelings – our emotions – is building on shifting sand. Rather we are to guard our hearts, grounding ourselves in the unchanging truths of the Word of God.
And the promise of God is life … and not just merely living … but Christ offers us “life to the full” “life more abundant” … rich, full life in Him … over and above … as Paul said “exceedingly more than we can ask or imagine.”
Believe me, when we ask God to search us, to know our hearts, we are crying out for His great protection … for wisdom … and for the fullness of life in Him … founded on and grounded in the precious, unchanging truth that He desperately loves us.
We are safe to open our hearts for His searching … oh the search may be painful at times … but it is a momentary pain that leads to a sweetness of fellowship with Him that brings wholeness and healing.
To know your heart?
What holds you back?
Photo by Jason Rogers Fotographie
Beautiful post, Teri Lynne – it called to mind for me the book Hinds Feet on High Places… makes me want to read it again. 🙂
You're so right – the search is painful sometimes, but the reward is rich.
I've been asking God to do this very thing in me lately and you're right…it it painful and slow. But I want the work to be His and in His time. Not mine.
Thank you sister. I am feeling a time of passing through the fire is on the way, and this post is just another help in that preparation. For me to diminish, I'll have to have the dross burnt off. Thank you.